People all around you are talking to friends, loved ones and complete strangers every day. They’re getting to know new people, getting all the good jobs and new friends and even getting relationships and dates. And what are you getting?
It’s time to change that. Ready?
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Well, you’re not going to be getting much if you aren’t right there with them, working on making new friends and getting to know people. But, your brain is running that self-esteem test and you’re failing before you even begin right? Well, you definitely don’t have to keep failing anymore.
What is the Self-Esteem Test?
The self-esteem test is all about learning how good (or not so good) your self-esteem really is. It’s about finding out how you perceive yourself and how you believe you fit into the world around you.
By taking this test or others like it, you actually have the ability to really focus on different aspects of your personality and understand more about what your personality is doing for you and how it’s hurting you, especially when it comes to how much you actually feel for yourself in a positive way or negative way.
Describe Yourself in Three Words
This is going to be step one. Think of three words (or we’ll even let you go with phrases) that you would use to describe yourself. You don’t have to share these words with anyone so be honest.
Are they all positive words like smart, funny, cute, kind, caring or anything like that? Or, are they all negative words like stupid, too-serious, ugly, spiteful, rude or anything else along the same lines? Maybe you have a mix of the two that you use to describe yourself.
If your words are all positive that’s great. It means you’re able to see yourself in a positive light and you do have some self-esteem. If the words are all negative that says that your self-esteem is quite low because the only things you really see about yourself are the bad things.
Try asking someone you love to describe you in three words. They might give you one or two ‘negatives’ like shy or withdrawn, but for the most part your friends are going to see the good things in you, like kindness, compassion or dedication. These are the things that other people are seeing in you and if you don’t see them, it shows that your self-esteem is lower (though it’s worth pointing out that we often don’t see all the great things about ourselves that others do).
What Do You Think of Yourself Compared to Others
Go ahead and take a few minutes to compare yourself to your best friend, your sister, your brother or even someone else that you know. How do you stack up? Are you able to see areas where you are better than them and areas where they are better than you? Are you able to see that you are a good person still, even if they may be more compassionate than you are?
It’s perfectly fine and perfectly normal to recognize that someone else is stronger than you are in certain areas, but if you can’t recognize that you are also stronger than them in certain areas, then chances are your self-esteem isn’t where it should be.
Sure your brother may be more outgoing than you, but is he as compassionate as you are? That other person at work may be better at the finances, but are they better at meeting deadlines?
Break it Down
Looking at yourself through a different lens isn’t always easy. What you want to do is make sure that you’re paying attention to your strengths and weaknesses.
Though there are always going to be people who are better than you at one thing or another, you’re always going to better than someone at the same time.
Your sister may be better than you at several things, but you’re better than her at several things as well. The same is true with everyone else you know.
Take a look at your current self-esteem levels and then start thinking about how your entire life would be different if you were able to change that. With higher self-esteem, you’re definitely going to be off to a much better life and who wouldn’t love that idea?
You’ll be making new friends in no time at all and you’re going to have a better shot at getting a job, finding a date and even just having some fun with strangers when you head out to dinner or to a concert or special event.