The world is somehow a lot harder when you don’t feel confident in yourself. Whether it’s just not your day or you’re lacking confidence in your general life, it can be hard to see a way out.
That’s why we put together 5 habits that you can use to help you build self-confidence day by day.
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1. Exercising every day will crush lacking confidence
Do at least some exercise every day. It doesn’t have to be an hour and a half at the gym killing yourself with a personal trainer to make up for your lacking confidence. It can be a 7 minute routine in the morning or just a small walk at lunch. If you drive to work and have a mostly sitting job, this is even more important.
A little bit of exercise every day will get a few endorphins going and make you feel more energized and positive – which, in itself, will help you make up for your lacking confidence. But exercise has so many other spin-off benefits:
- Improves your posture
- Makes your skin clearer
- Makes your clothes fit better
- Makes you stronger
All of these things will help boost your overall confidence.
2. Dress to impress
There’s an old adage that you dress for the job you want, not the job you have.
Well as it turns out, that actually works. Studies have shown again and again that dressing like a pro is the best way to get promoted, feel confident, and achieve your goals.
Of course, this goes beyond just professional wear for how others perceive you.
The real benefit?
Helping you internally boost your lacking confidence.
When we act with confidence (for example, when we’re confident because we’re wearing an amazing suit or a tasteful dress) people see that and react to it – positively.
It’s a bit of a ‘chicken or an egg situation’ – “are people respecting my personality and authority because I’m wearing nice clothes, or are they doing it because the clothes make me more confident?”
The honest answer is it doesn’t matter.
Dressing to impress is a great way to feel more confident and have better, more positive interactions with the world (which, in turn, builds your confidence even more).
And dressing to impress doesn’t necessarily mean wear nicer clothes.
It extends to being generally well groomed and looking after yourself. If you’re clean shaven, then shave regularly. If you’ve got a beard, groom it. If you have long hair, keep it tidy and healthy. Keep your shoes shined and your clothes clean.
These small details build up into a big overall picture of quiet, unassuming confidence.
Clothes and fashion not your thing? Talk to a personal stylist. A consultation is either free or relatively cheap and will make you feel a lot better about your choices and teach you the basics of what works for you to hold on to forever.
3. Do a small act of kindness
A small act of kindness is a great way to do something good and feel confident about yourself. Plus, it gives you a natural, easy conversation starter.
This can be as simple as buying a cup of coffee for a homeless person on a cold winter’s day to treating your significant other to a nice dinner to comforting a friend when they’re upset – the opportunity is endless and the cost to your emotional capacity is small.
Basically, being nice will change how others see you and how you see yourself. You’ll start to see yourself as a do-er, capable of solving any problem you come across.
4. Take risks
It might seem counter-intuitive, but taking risks and failing is one of the best things you can do to build up your lacking confidence.
Because every time you fail, you erode your fear of failure a little bit more.
Think of a one or two-year-old. They fail all the time! They are terrible at speaking, walking, moving, understanding the world around them, dexterity – everything!
And do they care?
Not. One. Iota.
The lack of fear of failure helps kids grow. And the same can be true for you. But to overcome that fear of failure (which manifests itself as lacking confidence) means you have to fail a lot.
Which brings us back to our point – take risks. And expect to fail.
These don’t have to be huge risks. It can be super small stuff like:
- Trying a new café
- Going out with a co-worker who you don’t know very well so it might be awkward
- Volunteering yourself to take on more responsibility at work
- Joining a new class or running group
- Trying a new activity
This easy level of risk will get your comfortable first with the thought that you might fail (after all, it might be the most painful co-worker drink ever!) but also with failure itself and how to get over it. At the end of it, you’ll be a more confident, happy version of yourself – guaranteed.
5. Slow down
The last bit of advice is slow down. Confident people don’t need to hurry. They already know where they’re going and when they’re going to get there.
Here’s a simple example. Think of someone you admire for their confidence – a good salesman maybe, or perhaps a mentor or teacher.
How fast do they talk?
Probably not very. It might not be the glacial pace of a Mississippi accent, but it’s probably not hurried.
Unconfident people rush because they feel like their words aren’t worth listening to. Confident people know better. They know what they have to say is important, and are confident that others will feel the same way. Simply slowing down the speed you talk makes you appear more confident to others and will help you feel less harried and more centered – both characteristics of confident people.
It’s not just talking, though. Confident people are prepared and on time. Whenever you’re going somewhere, make sure you have enough time to get there without rushing. You’ll feel better about it.
Finally, make sure you’re prepared. While flying by the seat of your pants might seem fun in the movies, there are few things that will destroy confidence as quickly as being unprepared for something. Whether it’s a first date for dinner and forgetting their name or going into a meeting and not knowing what the agenda is, it’s hard to be confident when all you want to focus on is leaving.
Now get out there. Try and roll out these small changes to your life one by one over the next week. That’s one per day. Easy.
Want more tips? Check out our simple techniques on being a more confident you!